How many of you know what you WANT out of your life?
I’m sure you can think “Hey, I WANT a bigger house” or “I WANT more money” or “I WANT my kids to go to a good college”…etc..
Now how bout this question….
How many of you know how you want to FEEL in life?
There’s a huge difference between a “want” and a “feel” and by understanding these differences may change they way you perceive your life.
“Wanting” is guessing what will make you feel good and comes from your head, while “feeling” is KNOWING what makes you feel good and comes from your heart…..and I’ll explain.
I can say “I WANT a house upstate in the woods” (because I do)
But expressing my “want” is ONLY limiting me to the “house in the woods”
Here’s the thing, I don’t ONLY want a house in the woods. I want to FEEL like I do when I’m actually IN the forest. The feeling I have when I wake up every morning looking over the mountains. When I’m hiking so far that I have no phone service or anyone for miles. When all thats left is the Earth and everything that mother nature intended. I want to close my eyes, touch the ground and breathe in the air.
THIS. IS. HOW. I. WANT. TO. FEEL.
So while I have all intentions to buy a house upstate in the woods, it’s not the actual house that I want, but the feeling that owning this house will ultimately give me. Get it?
Too often we want, want, WANT…
“I WANT more money”….…but why do you want the money?
Do you think that more money will make you happy? or solve something?
Money DOES NOT make anyone happy forever.
There are plenty of millionaires and probably billionaires that are sad, depressed and as anxiety ridden as all of us (probably more) because they also have more to lose.
If you made a million dollars tomorrow the next day you would want 2 million, then 3, then 4 and so on and so on…
The comedian/actor Jim Carrey has a great quote that goes “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of, so they can see that it’s not the answer.”
Now, you’re probably thinking “Well, he is rich and famous so he can say that”….well, that is the point, OF COURSE HE CAN SAY THAT!
Only a person who has been rich and famous can tell you that’s not the formula to happiness. Only a person who has what everyone “thinks” they want can then tell you it’s not the answer.
We are conditioned to think the more money we have the more successful we are. We feel like failures when we struggle with money and therefore our relationship to money becomes negative.
Abundance doesn’t only come in the form of money but it comes in the form of JOY.
How much JOY are you cultivating? How much JOY are the materialistic things in your life bringing you?…..probably not much.
JOY is eternal….
So, if you say, “My new car brings me joy” you are misinterpreting the word “joy”
Your new car brings you “momentary happiness” but not joy.
When the feeling of the new car fades and it just becomes flat tires, new brakes, oil changes, and unexplained dents and dings that car will now bring you pain and suffering also.
Are you starting to understand the difference between “wanting” and “feeling” yet?
I’ll ask again….HOW DO YOU WANT TO FEEL?
How do you want to FEEL in a relationship?
How do you want to FEEL in a career?
How do you want to FEEL about yourself?
Let’s try an exercise.
Think about the relationship you have with yourself. How do you truly FEEL about yourself? Do you FEEL content and satisfied or do FEEL unhappy, disgusting and vulnerable, maybe?
So, if it’s the latter, think….why do I feel this way?
…is it your weight? your age? your past history? your present life?
The energy from those thoughts create a vibration within and around you. It’s that vibration that creates a SERIOUS false perception of yourself. You actually see your reality through this distorted mirror and believe everyone else perceives you the same exact way also.
So, When you say “I WANT to be skinnier” you are only fooling yourself into thinking that when you’re skinnier you will be happy with yourself. In the meantime, you are obsessing over yourself NOT being what you think “skinny” is and staying stagnant in that FEELING.
In other words, you are actually manifesting a feeling you DON’T want and ultimately THAT is the feeling you will remain in….crazy, isn’t it? but it’s true.
It’s hard to say to yourself “I am beautiful” when you don’t actually FEEL beautiful. Affirmations like this are EXTREMELY powerful but they really only work when you FEEEEEL IT, which is why many people get discouraged with it.
So, how bout this…with your eyes closed think about how you want to FEEL about yourself instead of what you WANT to look like. Embody those emotions, vibrations and frequency of this feeling. Envision the joy that would shower over you as you become this person. Imagine it eternal and everlasting and imagine this feeling cannot be broken by anything in the physical.
When you feel you are there then say to this person “You are beautiful” and you will FEEL it.
Congrats!! You just manifested a FEELING instead of just a WANT. THIS is a TRUE affirmation.
You don’t have to limit this to yourself either, you can do this with ANYTHING (just like above when I mention my house in the woods)
“Wants” come with expectations and with expectations come disappointments. When you cultivate a “feeling” you don’t need expectations because the “feeling” IS the expectation.
When you manifest a FEELING the universe grants you the things you need to keep that existing in EVERY aspect of your life.
Start NOW by changing your thoughts from “I WANT” to “I want to FEEL”
“How do I want to FEEL?” Ask yourself this question everyday and within every situation, no matter what arises.
You will be surprised how your true self starts to emerge and the energy around you begins to change. Pay attention to what you actually receive versus what you really thought you wanted.
You really NEVER know what you want but you ALWAYS know how you want to FEEL.
I will close this blog with some of my own personal examples of how I want to FEEL. Now, while I can’t have these “physical” situations all the time I CAN have these feelings within EVERYTHING I do ALL THE TIME….Remember, it’s all up to you how you choose to perceive your life.
I want to FEEL like I do after hysterical laughing with my friends/family.
I want to FEEL like I do after I’m done meditating.
I want to FEEL like I do when a favorite song comes on in the car at the perfect time.
I want to FEEL like I do when I wake up next to the one I love, as the sunrises, on a day where we don’t have to rush out of bed.
I want to FEEL like I do at the end of a yoga practice laying in savasana.
I want to FEEL like I do after my morning Bulletproof coffee and my brain is running on full speed.
I want to FEEL like I do when I just ordered a flight of beers at a new brewery and I’m just about to take that first sip…yum. ( :
This is how I WANT TO FEEL all the time and everyday. While these are all different scenarios (and maybe not what YOU would want to feel) they ALL cultivate the SAME feeling for me……..JOY.
Find your FEELING…..and you will find your JOY.