So here we are at the end of another year and I’m sure you’re thinking, like everyone else….
“Where the hell did the year go?!”
It seems every year goes faster than the next and as you look back you realize that you didn’t do as much as you originally planned….and that’s ok.
No matter what happened this year we can all just be grateful to be here.
The new year can be full of resolutions, new habits and a sense of renewal….but as we worry about eating better, losing weight, being better people, etc…are we taking all the baggage from prior years with us?
Are we attempting new habits but still holding onto bad ones? Are we still allowing our past to affect our present moments?
So, in my last blog of the year I’d just like to share some small but very powerful lessons.
Following just these 3 secrets has transformed me in so many ways and hopefully you all may be able to enter 2020 with NEW eyes and a NEW perspective!
1.) Take 100% responsibility for yourself.
Real mind blower, I know….but 100% doesn’t mean 99.9%…..it means 100%!
Taking 100% responsibility for yourself, while may seem pretty obvious, can unfortunately be the hardest for most people to ACTUALLY do.
Taking 100% responsibility for yourself means you take FULL responsibility for where you are RIGHT NOW….no exceptions.
Now, people will say “Well, I didn’t choose for certain things to happen to me” or “That situation was out of my control” and that may be true……but, I guarantee, you DID make a choice somewhere that brought you to that particular situation.
Taking responsibility doesn’t mean you can avoid the pain of a situation or an uncontrollable situation….it’s that YOU control the choices you make and accept the outcome no matter what might be “out of your control”.
You have ALWAYS had control of what kind of job you accept, what kind of relationships you accept into your life, how much you choose to focus on health, how many kids to have, your attitude, the way you react to a situation or event, etc…..
You have made EVERY choice at EVERY point in your life.
If someone does something traumatic to you then THAT might be painful but YOU choose the suffering and for how long you choose to suffer.
If you slice your hand with a knife do you keep torturing yourself by digging your fingers into it? There’s a number of things you might not be able to do with your hand, but you will learn to accept that as just something that happens when you cut your hand, right?
It was YOUR choice to pick up that knife even if it was never an intention to cut yourself.
Will the cut discourage you from ever picking up a knife again?? No….do you blame the knife? No. The knife caused the pain, yes, but if you dig into the wound with your finger, well…..that’s just a little silly.
We tend to blame others for our issues in life and we tend to blame situations from our past for why we “think” we are stuck in our lives.
You will run into a lot of knives in your lifetime and they may even cut you and leave scars, but it is YOUR CHOICE to pick at the scab till it bleeds again. That choice has nothing to do with the knife.
Start to take 100% responsibility for yourself.
You may not have caused the trauma, that forced you into a rough life, but it is YOUR choice to create your present reality going forward.
The thing is you are NOT alone. Someone somewhere has gone through EXACTLY the same situation and has survived. Someone has gone through what you are going through RIGHT NOW and is now thriving!
It is up to you…ALL OF IT! 100%
Forgive the past, Forgive others, and most importantly….FORGIVE YOURSELF.
Practice taking 100% RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF and watch how your energy shifts into a more rewarding and beautiful reality ( :
I mention gratitude in probably ALL my blogs because I believe it is THE #1 secret to an amazing life.
Just be grateful…..FOR EVERYTHING.
Gratitude shifts your energy into a higher frequency and the more grateful you are the more you will continue to receive.
Practice with just waking up each day and thinking of 3 things you are grateful for. This means DON’T look at your phone, DON’T check emails, and DON’T even get out of bed before doing this.
Even on your worst days you can always find something to be grateful for….family, a compassionate friend, your children, your eyes, ears, legs…..there is ALWAYS something.
Sending your energy to things of higher vibration shifts you into THAT vibration and will completely awaken you to a new perspective.
We all have so much to be grateful for yet most of us obsess over the things we don’t have or the things we “think” will make our lives happier.
Most of us don’t understand the abundance of amazing things within our lives, until we lose something we love.
So instead of waiting and wishing you didn’t take something for granted, be grateful RIGHT NOW.
It’s a gift to be able to read this, because some can’t. It’s a gift to have a stressful job, because some are begging for money. It’s a gift to have an annoying crazy family, because some are alone. It’s a gift to have a small, cluttered apartment, because some are living on the streets.
Seriously, It’s a gift to just be alive today, because some or not.
Acceptance is hard for most people but I cant overstate the importance of mastering this secret.
Acceptance isn’t condoning or even being happy with a situation….it’s just accepting your reality the way it is unfolding.
Most of our suffering is caused by us wanting things to be something other then what they actually are. We try so hard to avoid pain that we end up causing ourselves MORE pain.
Accepting the wonderful moments in your life must be the same as accepting the painful ones. We don’t need to be happy about them but we must accept them in order to FULLY be able to let go and move forward.
Resentment is an example of something that halts acceptance.
If you are holding onto resentment this will ONLY imprison YOU. Acceptance of whatever you may have gone through (or continue to go through) will FREE you from this prison that you have only created yourself.
It’s not easy and this doesn’t mean we force ourselves to feel good when we actually feel sad.
This practice is just being able to feel sad but knowing that the sadness IS NOT who we are. It is just an emotion and WILL pass.
Happy moments are also something we need to FULLY accept. Yes, it’s a lot easier to accept a happy moment, but can you accept that the “happy” moment will also pass?
How many of you spend your vacations counting the days till it’s over and stressing about going back to work, instead of just enjoying each moment for what it is?
Moments, situations and emotions are are ALL fleeting and we have a tendency to attach to these things and cause ourselves unnecessary pain.
Practice acceptance in the moment. Practice acceptance of the past. Practice acceptance of what is to come.
…and how do we practice acceptance?
GRATITUDE and taking 100% RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF.
…see what I did there?
All 3 of these secrets work together and they are ALL a “practice”.
A “practice” means just that….we practice.
What do we do when we want to be better at something?
We do our VERY BEST everyday and we don’t beat ourselves up if we mess up. Maybe some days are easy. Maybe some days it’s just too hard.
…and that’s ok ( :
We tend to take life too seriously and we tend to be EXTREMELY hard on ourselves. You have spent your WHOLE life developing your bad habits and conditioned behaviors so it will take time. It all depends on the choices YOU make and how bad you want it.
Just practice and have patience ( :
Take each day and each moment one step at a time and DON’T overthink.
Each day is a BRAND NEW opportunity to do it all again!
Let the past be just that…..the past. Dream of the future but don’t live in it.
Take a deep breath RIGHT NOW and realize that YOU CAN have any life you choose.
Accept your reality. Take 100% responsibility for yourself. Be Grateful.
Stop worrying so much……It’s just life.
2020 is gonna be AMAZING so buckle up!
Many Blessings for the NEW YEAR!